Do you know what concerns me the most about people who try to defend what they think is the right thing is that they end up doing it the wrong way and very much embarrassing themselves in my space. I often generalize, I mentally refer to myself as the queen of generalization lol, and of course I have people who don’t like it and when they insist on getting me to hear them out, I usually throw the conversation under the bus and move on with my life. I do not generalize based on speculation and gossip, my generalization just like most generalization comes from a place of facts, evidence and commonality. The reason I refuse to give a platform to the people who question why I generalize and tell me not to is because they have refused to acknowledge the reason the generalization exists and anything I’ll be letting them do is to deflect. I’m often told that I like being right but that’s not the problem, the problem is I like learning and correcting myself, updating the information I have and views I hold so I do not go around sharing old information that could possibly harm groups of people. You should have an open mind for clarification and new knowledge but a number of people run away from that.
The art of generalization in my book is when the majority greatly exceeds the minority but there is an exemption.
We have explained NotAllMen on this platform and I think it’s a topic I try avoiding especially when it’s brought up in heated conversations and important discussions. The purpose of notAllmen is to deflect from conversations and real life scenarios that proves men to be violent, it’s also when racism comes up and you say AllLivesMatter during a B.L.M rally, it also comes up when we say TranswomenAreNotWomen during an LGBTQ protest. It gradually deflects from the problem, the issue being talked about is thrown under the bus and the discussion then revolves around why the problem is nonexistent in the first place.
Do you ask questions or do you argue? When there is a generalization, you should ask a question if you are unaware as to why the generalization exists in the first place. You keep hearing MenAreScum and all you’ve done is to argue why they aren’t scum but it has never gotten you anywhere, why not ask a question on why it exists. Some days ago I was talking about how gay/bisexual men are at higher risk of getting raped and abused than straight men. I also talked about how gay/bisexual men are raped by straight men and oh my, a number of people were surprised and I received a lot of backlash. I had people calling me a liar, a man-hater, horrible feminist and all that but no one asked me any question worth answering. The hatred for homosexuality is the reason you refuse to research on violent crimes against the lgbtq community, you would think gay/bisexual men are somehow responsible for raping men since that’s always the excuse but for the most part, the men in the lgbtq community are targeted for rape by straight men.
Rape isn’t guided by one’s sexual orientation and according to Psychotherapist Jonathan C. Stillerman, it doesn’t exist and for every now informed person out there who would like to argue with me about it, I’m very much uninterested.
Rape is primarily prompted by anger or a desire to harm, intimidate or dominate, rather than by sexual attraction or a rapist’s assumption about his intended victim’s sexual preference.
I called straight men “really disgusting animalistic pieces of shit” and I meant it with all my heart, I still do by the way., Straight men are also raped by other straight men and I want to put this out there, rape does not have to be done by the insertion of the penis into the body. It can be the insertion of a finger, an object into the body without consent. When you read on the type of rape inmates in prison are subjected to, you’d know that rape isn’t solely based on the secondary sexual characteristic.
Why am I angry at the generalization rather than the problem/reason behind it? Simple. You are angry because you don’t want to believe it exists, you want to see yourself presented in a good light because you’re a “good person” and your name doesn’t have to bashed this way. Generalization isn’t about you and the world would be a better place if you stopped making it about you.
Generalization isn’t based on speculation, it is based on fact and evidence.
I know some people aren’t ever okay with any type of generalization and their purpose for bringing it up isn’t a means to deviate from the issue and that is why I’m telling you, for every time a generalization is made not based on speculation and the first thing that you get from it is notAll or some, you’re deviating and adding to the problem. You’re choosing to ignore people’s problem because it doesn’t suit your narrative. People’s problems and experiences aren’t yours to agree with nor oppose, they’re not yours.
Those who try to portray themselves as the nice guys during generalization are often the ones who never make any contributions to the discussion whatsoever. They’re the ones who never speak on anything about anything.
If you still don’t get anything I’ve said so far, there’s nothing I can do for you.
Johnathan C. Stillerman, Psychotherapist and co-director of MCSR.
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Thanks for reading kids!